A little alone time.

There are very few people that I can be around 24-7 and not get tired of easily. Basically I can count them on one hand. This is not me trying to be mean or trying to say that I hate people. I just have to have my alone time every once in a while. Lu and I have become masters at learning how to pick up on when the other person needs alone time. Usually after it we end up talking in the hall until 2 AM :) I think it's part of my introverted-ness coming out in me. That's a trait that has been developing more and more as the years go by, and I'm starting to embrace it.

It's been really hard to have alone time since I arrived in Spain. First it was vacation with the family, then I moved in and had orientation/getting to know the roomie stuff, and now everyone is starting to get comfortable with each other and hanging out more. I realized Saturday that I was long overdue for some time to just sit.

After IKEA, I needed to pick up a few things from some stores in La Placa Catalunya. Anna wanted to go home, and it was like the skies opened up. I'm very grateful that Anna is my roommate. She's really sweet and a lot of fun, but like I said before, the alone time was necessary. We haven't mastered the art as well as Lu and I have. We probably won't. So, Anna and I parted ways and I got to spend two excellent hours alone.

I browsed El Corte Ingles (it's like the Wal-Mart of Barcelona, but with high end goods... think Carolina Herrera and Burberry mixed with a little Home Depot mixed with Best Buy. The most excellent one-stop shop!), I went to a book store, and then I decided I wanted a little coffee. Lucky for me there's a Starbucks about a quarter of a mile from the book store (past Sephora, Godiva, Camper... there's some seriously good shopping here!) So, I got my coffee (grande latte, a little cinnamon, a little chocolate, and a lot of sugar) and headed out the door to sit on the patio.

The I remembered that I don't sit in eating/drinking places alone.

It actually terrifies me.

It was then that I second guessed my decision for some alone time. I thought about calling someone, but I realized that both of my phones were dead. I looked for a book in my purse, but I realized that I had taken it out. I had come to Starbucks to enjoy my wonderful latte and time by myself and I would have to sit outside alone and look like a loser. What's a girl to do?

Well, I prayed.

I prayed that while I sat there the Lord would increase my appreciation for the opportunity to be in Spain. I prayed that I would be observant of the people around me. I prayed that for at least 30 minutes I would be aware of my dependence on other people's company and overcome it. I have to say that after those 30 minutes alone I felt better than I had the entire time in Barcelona up to that point. A family sat beside me and their small son blew kisses at me the whole time. I realized that I'm more drawn to "nerdy" people. The "cool" ones aren't interesting. I realized that I really can be more independent. I also realized that I'm not quite as independent as I want to think I am. I realized that there are a lot of things that I'm still learning about myself and the world around me.

So, I've decided to go somewhere alone, outside of my apartment, at least 2 times a week. I think it would be beneficial to me, my roommates (another one is coming at the beginning of October), and all of you back home. You can hold me to it.

Now I'm going to have my alone time for the day :)